Living and Learning

I need to learn Swedish. Being in an environment in which I don't speak the language is different and faintly scary. Paris, of course, presented difficulties, but they were outweighed by meeting Ash and hanging out with Hobblings for a long weekend.

Here, I stammer and blush at the supermarket checkout, until the staff take pity on me and switch to English. I nod and smile when I don't undertand what people are saying. I used to be a paragon of social nuance! I could approach complete strangers with utmost confidence and win them over with a smile and a joke. In fact, it was my job to do so! I spoke to Sean the other day, and he couldn't imagine me out of my depth and not talking to people.

I'm not complaining. I really do love Sweden, and being with Ash, and seeing things that I've never seen before. Sometimes I stop and realise exactly where I am and what I'm doing, and it makes me so happy. It's a wonderful experience. But Swedish is such a tricky language. Just hearing it on a daily basis makes me want to cross my arms and say 'No, it's too hard, I can't.' Maybe it's my failed attempts at learning Indonesian speaking, or maybe it's just me at the point before I get motivated and rise to the challenge.

No doubt, I'll pick up bits and pieces and will eventually learn to make myself understood. I'm looking forward to that, and not just because I want to show off my Swedish when I get home. I need to dig in my heels and grab hold of this problem. I want to be able to chat and joke with Swedes, even if they are, as Ash says, a taciturn people. I want to be confident with another language.

And then I'll have absolutely nothing to complain about...