My mind just went completely blank.
Now I remember what I wanted to post about...
I was in my Australian Literature class yesterday, and we were looking at the worst book in the world, the hated (by me) 'Monkey Grip' by Helen 'Paul McCartney' Garner. Now, I don't know about anyone else, but I have a real problem with the main character. Basically, she has an intense sexual connection with this guy called Javo, who is a heroin addict. She also has mind-blowing sex with him (which I found... slightly sickening - there was a lot of fairly crude language) and becomes horribly upset when he's either out of it or off having sex with some random one-dimentional chick. The character herself, Nora, despite this "amazing" connection with Javo continues to have sex all over the place with faceless blokes from her community.
I just didn't understand why. I mean, if she's so upset with him sleeping around, why would she do it herself? The text shows that she has no emotional reactions when having sex with these randoms, so why would she do it? I just can't get my head around... the point...
Maybe I'm just a girl who is made for one other person. And sure, there are many people around me whom I love. But that doesn't change the fact that I have one person who absolutely completes me.
Is there something wrong with me, that I can't understand the reasoning behind random, emotionless, meaningless sex. She doesn't even appear to get any pleasure out of it...
I just don't understand.
posted by Emma @ 12:31 pm
8 Comments:
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Remember the last time you, Q and I tried to talk about this? Ended with everyone in a huffy. It might just be one of those things that can't be explained properly. There's certainly nothing wrong with you though.
I don't get that either. I know that some people do, but it's not for me.
Sex and love are not the same thing.
One can most certainly have sex just for the fun and pleasure of the sex, with little or no emotional connection. Not biologically sound for health reasons but common enough. One can also be very much "in love" in the romantic sense with someone that one has never, and even never expects to, have sex with, and feel complete with that person. Think of old fashioned chivalry. In the romantic stories of that type the love is often impossible, often of a man for a married woman of higher station.
Nonetheless, sex and love probably work best together. In any case, double standards are a problem.
Part of me can understand why some people feel the need to have random casual sex, if only for the adrenaline buzz. But it's not something I could ever contemplate doing myself. I'd feel degraded, somehow, sharing that most initmate contact with so many meaningless people. It would take away its meaning in a true relationship.
That knowledge of sharing myself with only one person, whom I love, is important to me. But not everyone views sex that way... and, as Heather said, love and sex do not always go hand in hand.
I get the fact that people can have meaningless sex... I personally just cannot imagine what a possible benefit would be, aside from momentary pleasure...
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I suppose so. I think my view can be summed up by what daisy said, actually.
*shrugs* I guess I just don't get it.
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